Are you one of those people who are Famous, Trending, in Hollywood, Outside of the Philippines, and is a Half American, Canadian, Australian, German (or whatever) while only having a Droplet of Filipino blood? Yes? Then congratulations! You are part of the “Pinoy Pride” list of honors. Because of your unwavering hard work and passion on the following fields such as – singing, dancing, sports, acting, culinary, arts or whatever you do, even if you just helped an old woman cross the road, BUT as long as you hit every check list written above – then you are the coveted “Pinoy Pride”. Many have tried, many have failed yet only a few were chosen. I bet you didn’t even know the country Philippines, but that’s totally fine! As long as your mother or father, or the mother of the friend of your neighbor is a Filipino, that automatically makes you 5% Filipino (or whatever), we are Proud of you and the famous accomplishments you have done overseas. We now own you, whether you like it or not. We are claiming you to be one of us! I bet your other fellow classmates who are present on their native land, conducting community feeding, giving back to the poor and other humanitarian acts will not be given the attention, the way we gave so much to you – because you know what? Who gives a shit about them? Because people who are trying to make the world a better place don’t really matter, right? Unlike you, your blood are like water-color, mixed and unique. Nobody gives a shit about these dingy primary colors like blue, red, and yellow – anyway they are just here in the Philippines, we can see them anytime. Such bore.
Oh wait! I heard some of you “Honor students” are here in the Philippines to play some good sports, well we’ll place that as an exception on the list – its fine ! As long as you have a drop of “Filipino” blood, even if you don’t understand our language – only English or “Mwahal kow Kayow lahat“, we will accept you and parade you all around so that the world will know you are part of the Philippines. You don’t drink our water because you’ll get sick? That’s fine! Just play with us on the international league games and win with us. I heard you’d be playing football, go for it! There’s another game going on, in Rugby and some dragon-boat race shit, but I will support you guys instead – you are waaaay handsome white and adorable thus you deserve our cheers. I can’t even recognize you because you are so white with blue eyes – and on the contrary I am brown. I don’t even recognize which is the Philippine team, and which is the opponents’ team! Im guessing that this must be some sort of a advance strategic play, to try to catch the opponents off guard. But kudos to you, you are still awesome.
BLEEP you people who come to our country as vacationers and sight see-ers. So what if you give us feedback on how we run things here, such as our tourist spots and hotels. We just cannot accept the fact that we are far from perfect. Such criticism, whether good or bad, is not welcome here. Therefore take your (albeit constructive) criticism out of this country, because from the wise wise words of a toddler, “We never ever want to see you again!” *sticks tongue out*
Hey you girl, I heard your a great singer! You won second on this foreign singing competition right? And I see you hit our list too! We will support you, more than we support our local singers. You had a great voice, I bet that’s from your 5% Filipino blood. I just knew it! Filipinos are really great! “So ahm… When are you visiting the Philippines?”.
This article is in collaboration with: